Grace in sin

A greater part of my life was spent with a warped view of who I am. I was a good person. Within my anger and emptiness of heart, I was still a good person because there was reason behind my madness. The world centered around me. I was saved around the age of 17 and have been a follower of Christ for 7 years now. As I grow more in the Lord I am still confronted by this one question: what is the essence of my nature?
'The more the Holy Spirit puts his finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand the wells to my nature' (Francis Schaeffer: True Spirituality)
I think what Schaffer was saying in this is that we often fool ourselves deep inside our hearts of the degree to which we are now sinning less, create an illusion of how we are on the fast track to holiness in our lives. He writes later that as the Holy Spirit has wrestled with him over the years, he is more aware of the depths of his own nature. I think I relate to what he is saying in that I can honestly say that I have never seen myself as being more selfish in my life than I do now. There always seems to be something for me in 'the good that I do' and I hate how that looks from where I stand. So am I totally depraved?...yes. When I look at that and begin to understand that more, I am at awe and humbled at the thought that God still uses me in ministry when my selfishness and sin taints it. What s it about Him? I have been struck by the thought of how God is so patient with me when I do not deserve any of His grace. I am thankful for His grace and His Holy Spirit.
'The more the Holy Spirit puts His finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand that there are deep wells to my nature.'