As a blade of grass, so my life feels like
So frail and weak just as I am
As a helpless babe, so am I
So powerless and dependent
As fearful as the darting of a squirrel, just as I feel
So afraid, directionless, so my heart is
I am frail, weak and fearful
My heart longs for a peace that this world cannot offer
My soul is not at rest
My mind is not at ease
Grant me grace O Lord my Savior
Shed light in this darkness
Help me to see the rays of the sun in this enclosure
Make the lighthouse visible from my stray sailing
I am lost, desperate, and fearful
You are my God, for that I am thankful
You are my Father; hear the cries of your child
You are my strength; listen to the voice of a weak heart
You are my shield; seal me for your thoughts that are above
You are my light; guide my steps and may I ever walk with you
Tuesday, October 30, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Grace in Calamity
As I look outside the window the distant billowing smoke buoys in such an arresting way. Last night the orange flames from the distant hills started to be visible from the campus as the rushing winds continued to blow in every direction. For those of you who have not heard, the wild fires are now also in Santa Clarita. The school hasn't been evacuated yet and prayerfully there will be no need to. Several people have already lost their homes, two of whom I know (one from my church, and another from my school). As all of this is going on, a pivotal question confronts us, Christian and non-Christian alike. How should we view this phenomenon? Solomon writes
"For as he thinks within himself, so he is." Proverbs 23:7a
In essence, the way that we filter through what is going on around us, including fires, says a lot about our heart and our relationship with God. Some of the people in the affected areas have been evacuated to Saugus high school (about a 15 minute drive from school). I went there last night with Dan and Ryan to see if there was anything we could do to help the red cross. We spent about two hours helping with setting up beds and blankets for those who were coming in. There was so much worry and dejection writen on some of the faces as the sheriff's department gave updates on the efforts being made to put out the fires and save homes. By 10.30pm we were pretty much all set up and we decided to talk to people and see if the Lord would provide opportunities for sharing the gospel. After talking with a couple of elderly ladies we found ourselves engaged in a two hour conversation with a Jewish man with whom we were able to share the gospel with. We came back around 1.30am.
So what am I learning from all of this? My first response when the fires started and the winds unleashed their power was that of praise. Praise to a powerful God to whom the elements were testifying of.
"The heavens are telling of the glory of God; And their expanse is declaring the work of His hands. Day to day pours forth speech, And night to night reveals knowledge. There is no speech, nor are there words; Their voice is not heard. Their line has gone out through all the earth, And their utterances to the end of the world In them He has placed a tent for the sun, Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber; It rejoices as a strong man to run his course. Its rising is from one end of the heavens, And its circuit to the other end of them; And there is nothing hidden from its heat. " (Psalm 19:1-6)
We call this general revelation, in which God makes Himself known through His creation. As we see it we are pointed to God. The God of this creation is a powerful God who controls even the wind and fires. We should thus be driven to worship Him as the source of all creation and the one who upholds and sustains all things.
The second thing that I thought about was that of petition. God uses events like these to bring people to Himself and to arouse them to the reality that we are dependent o Him. It is at times like these that perhaps people may start asking questions about God and even be driven to prayer and more importantly, salvation. I was excited about this last night. When we went to the evacuation center at Saugus High School, yes I wanted to be salt and light by helping out, but I was more excited about the opportunity to share Christ with people and be used in planting those seeds. My prayer or petition is that people would be drawn to God during this time.
The third thing that comes to mind is that of where we place our treasures. This is very important because it does determine a lot our response in situations such as these. I do not own a house, perhaps one day, Lord willing, I will. But this really got me thinking how I would respond if I lost my house in a fire, flood, or whatever. For a lot of the people I saw last night, this is where their heart was, in their possessions. Some kept pacing up and down, and I am sure some cried themselves to sleep. I do not discount that we are human and an element of sadness naturally accompanies something like this. But the question is, 'where do you see God in all of this?' Do you still see God as the provider or an angry ogre unleashing havoc on this earth? Is God still a loving God who takes care of us or does He seem removed from us? Listen to Christ's words:
"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.
"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal;
for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." (Matthew 6:19 - 21)
Indeed, where our treasure is, there our heart will also be. What is my treasure in this world? Christ should be my treasure. If there is anything else that I cannot bear to lose on this earth and is taking the place of my Lord, I am storing my treasure on earth. May this cause us to look more forward to being in Heaven. Everything on this earth can perish or die in a second. Would I rather cling to those temporal things or eternal things? What is my treasure?
The last thing that I thought of when summing this up was the question I am sure a lot of people in Santa Clarita, San Diego, and Malibu are asking themselves as they lose their homes. How can a good God allow this? What is the reasoning in God's mind in doing this? To some, it is an evil. There is no easy answer to this question and I will not pretend to know God's mind. What I know is that God is Sovereign, he is in control of everything, God is good. He orchestrates and allows events. God does not shy away in His Word for saying He is responsible for times like these
"That men may know from the rising to the setting of the sun that there is no one besides Me. I am the LORD, and there is no other, The One forming light and creating darkness, causing well-being and creating calamity; I am the LORD who does all these." (Isaiah 45:6, 7)
I don't know why exactly this calamity was allowed by God, but what I do know is this: HIS NAME WILL BE GLORIFIED and let that be our prayer today. May all things work together for His good. May He comfort His people and have grace on them. May He bring people into the lives of those affected by the fires to share the gospel and may His name be glorified.
"For as he thinks within himself, so he is." Proverbs 23:7a
In essence, the way that we filter through what is going on around us, including fires, says a lot about our heart and our relationship with God. Some of the people in the affected areas have been evacuated to Saugus high school (about a 15 minute drive from school). I went there last night with Dan and Ryan to see if there was anything we could do to help the red cross. We spent about two hours helping with setting up beds and blankets for those who were coming in. There was so much worry and dejection writen on some of the faces as the sheriff's department gave updates on the efforts being made to put out the fires and save homes. By 10.30pm we were pretty much all set up and we decided to talk to people and see if the Lord would provide opportunities for sharing the gospel. After talking with a couple of elderly ladies we found ourselves engaged in a two hour conversation with a Jewish man with whom we were able to share the gospel with. We came back around 1.30am.
So what am I learning from all of this? My first response when the fires started and the winds unleashed their power was that of praise. Praise to a powerful God to whom the elements were testifying of.
"The heavens are telling of the glory of God; And their expanse is declaring the work of His hands. Day to day pours forth speech, And night to night reveals knowledge. There is no speech, nor are there words; Their voice is not heard. Their line has gone out through all the earth, And their utterances to the end of the world In them He has placed a tent for the sun, Which is as a bridegroom coming out of his chamber; It rejoices as a strong man to run his course. Its rising is from one end of the heavens, And its circuit to the other end of them; And there is nothing hidden from its heat. " (Psalm 19:1-6)
We call this general revelation, in which God makes Himself known through His creation. As we see it we are pointed to God. The God of this creation is a powerful God who controls even the wind and fires. We should thus be driven to worship Him as the source of all creation and the one who upholds and sustains all things.
The second thing that I thought about was that of petition. God uses events like these to bring people to Himself and to arouse them to the reality that we are dependent o Him. It is at times like these that perhaps people may start asking questions about God and even be driven to prayer and more importantly, salvation. I was excited about this last night. When we went to the evacuation center at Saugus High School, yes I wanted to be salt and light by helping out, but I was more excited about the opportunity to share Christ with people and be used in planting those seeds. My prayer or petition is that people would be drawn to God during this time.
The third thing that comes to mind is that of where we place our treasures. This is very important because it does determine a lot our response in situations such as these. I do not own a house, perhaps one day, Lord willing, I will. But this really got me thinking how I would respond if I lost my house in a fire, flood, or whatever. For a lot of the people I saw last night, this is where their heart was, in their possessions. Some kept pacing up and down, and I am sure some cried themselves to sleep. I do not discount that we are human and an element of sadness naturally accompanies something like this. But the question is, 'where do you see God in all of this?' Do you still see God as the provider or an angry ogre unleashing havoc on this earth? Is God still a loving God who takes care of us or does He seem removed from us? Listen to Christ's words:
"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal.
"But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal;
for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." (Matthew 6:19 - 21)
Indeed, where our treasure is, there our heart will also be. What is my treasure in this world? Christ should be my treasure. If there is anything else that I cannot bear to lose on this earth and is taking the place of my Lord, I am storing my treasure on earth. May this cause us to look more forward to being in Heaven. Everything on this earth can perish or die in a second. Would I rather cling to those temporal things or eternal things? What is my treasure?
The last thing that I thought of when summing this up was the question I am sure a lot of people in Santa Clarita, San Diego, and Malibu are asking themselves as they lose their homes. How can a good God allow this? What is the reasoning in God's mind in doing this? To some, it is an evil. There is no easy answer to this question and I will not pretend to know God's mind. What I know is that God is Sovereign, he is in control of everything, God is good. He orchestrates and allows events. God does not shy away in His Word for saying He is responsible for times like these
"That men may know from the rising to the setting of the sun that there is no one besides Me. I am the LORD, and there is no other, The One forming light and creating darkness, causing well-being and creating calamity; I am the LORD who does all these." (Isaiah 45:6, 7)
I don't know why exactly this calamity was allowed by God, but what I do know is this: HIS NAME WILL BE GLORIFIED and let that be our prayer today. May all things work together for His good. May He comfort His people and have grace on them. May He bring people into the lives of those affected by the fires to share the gospel and may His name be glorified.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Holy Grace
Therefore, prepare your minds for action, keep sober in spirit, fix your hope completely on the grace to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ. As obedient children, do not be conformed to the former lusts which were yours in your ignorance, but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior; because it is written,
"YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY."
If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth; knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ. For He was foreknown before the foundation of the world, but has appeared in these last times for the sake of you who through Him are believers in God, who raised Him from the dead and gave Him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God. (1 Peter 1: 13-21)
This is the passage that John preached on last night at youth group. This was one of those messages that the Lord really used in my life to remind me of the most basic things that I sometimes take for granted. 'Holiness,' what a concept! A question was posed tonight;
'If you knew Christ was coming a year from now, or six months, or 5 minutes from now, would you live differently?'
For me the answer would be yes. I do not think I live my life reflective of this mentality a lot of times. This is a mentality that is constantly conscious of the reality of Christ's return at any minute. I am thankful that the Lord has been making me more conscious of the reality of Heaven and yearning more to be constantly in His Holy presents. A couple of weeks ago I closed my Bible after my morning devotions and the inscription on the front cover captivated me and got me into a deep muse. It read "Holy Bible." A great many times have I seen this inscription, but never really thought about it. I stood there thinking about this and wondering why of all of God's attributes the inscription emphasised only one, that of God's Holiness? Wrath is also one of God's attributes...why not have it as the wrathful Bible, or love...the lovely Bible (ok, maybe not, otherwise we would have a lot of pink Bibles floating around). I thought of Holiness as the only attribute that is in three-fold repetition (trihagion) as in Isaiah 6:3, Rev 4:8). Perhaps this is why. One thing has been standing out of late to me though...our high calling before a Holy God; and that is holiness (to be set apart, clean, pure). 1 Peter 1:15 reads
but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior;
16because it is written, "YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY."
Why am I to be set apart, clean, and pure? First, Because of who God is. He is Holy and whether we like it or not, there is going to be a judgment. At this judgment, there shall be no scheming or excuses that we get away with here on earth with people. Here we can hide things from others, put on a face. But God knows every aspect of our lives, every private thought, every action, and for that we shall be judged. This aspect of God's holiness should cause us to fear and tremble.
17If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth;
My stay here on earth is temporary. I am not a citizen of this earth but of Heaven (Philippians 3:20). That is why I yearn for being there and see death as a blessing for those who are saved. Second, I pursue holiness because I am God's child. God is the perfect Father, and like a son, I am to imitate Him. Thirdly, I am to pursue holiness because of the price that was paid for my sin.
18knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers,
19but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ
I am saved by the grace of God, who sent His Son to die for my sin apart from whom I have no hope of ever being holy. It is by this grace of God and faith in the work of His Son alone that I am saved. The price paid for my sin was the most precious gift that God had and He allowed it to die a painful death and take upon a heavy burden (my sin). It was not through gold, or silver...but the precious blood of His Son.
Father, thank you for your Son and the work that He did on the cross for me. Thank you for the resurrection, without which I would be hopeless. Thank you for your holiness, of which I yearn to imitate. Help me to continue pursuing holiness by the strength of your Spirit. I know I fall far short of this call because of my sin, that is why I need your grace in forgiveness and endurance to finish this race.
"YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY."
If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth; knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers, but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ. For He was foreknown before the foundation of the world, but has appeared in these last times for the sake of you who through Him are believers in God, who raised Him from the dead and gave Him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God. (1 Peter 1: 13-21)
This is the passage that John preached on last night at youth group. This was one of those messages that the Lord really used in my life to remind me of the most basic things that I sometimes take for granted. 'Holiness,' what a concept! A question was posed tonight;
'If you knew Christ was coming a year from now, or six months, or 5 minutes from now, would you live differently?'
For me the answer would be yes. I do not think I live my life reflective of this mentality a lot of times. This is a mentality that is constantly conscious of the reality of Christ's return at any minute. I am thankful that the Lord has been making me more conscious of the reality of Heaven and yearning more to be constantly in His Holy presents. A couple of weeks ago I closed my Bible after my morning devotions and the inscription on the front cover captivated me and got me into a deep muse. It read "Holy Bible." A great many times have I seen this inscription, but never really thought about it. I stood there thinking about this and wondering why of all of God's attributes the inscription emphasised only one, that of God's Holiness? Wrath is also one of God's attributes...why not have it as the wrathful Bible, or love...the lovely Bible (ok, maybe not, otherwise we would have a lot of pink Bibles floating around). I thought of Holiness as the only attribute that is in three-fold repetition (trihagion) as in Isaiah 6:3, Rev 4:8). Perhaps this is why. One thing has been standing out of late to me though...our high calling before a Holy God; and that is holiness (to be set apart, clean, pure). 1 Peter 1:15 reads
but like the Holy One who called you, be holy yourselves also in all your behavior;
16because it is written, "YOU SHALL BE HOLY, FOR I AM HOLY."
Why am I to be set apart, clean, and pure? First, Because of who God is. He is Holy and whether we like it or not, there is going to be a judgment. At this judgment, there shall be no scheming or excuses that we get away with here on earth with people. Here we can hide things from others, put on a face. But God knows every aspect of our lives, every private thought, every action, and for that we shall be judged. This aspect of God's holiness should cause us to fear and tremble.
17If you address as Father the One who impartially judges according to each one's work, conduct yourselves in fear during the time of your stay on earth;
My stay here on earth is temporary. I am not a citizen of this earth but of Heaven (Philippians 3:20). That is why I yearn for being there and see death as a blessing for those who are saved. Second, I pursue holiness because I am God's child. God is the perfect Father, and like a son, I am to imitate Him. Thirdly, I am to pursue holiness because of the price that was paid for my sin.
18knowing that you were not redeemed with perishable things like silver or gold from your futile way of life inherited from your forefathers,
19but with precious blood, as of a lamb unblemished and spotless, the blood of Christ
I am saved by the grace of God, who sent His Son to die for my sin apart from whom I have no hope of ever being holy. It is by this grace of God and faith in the work of His Son alone that I am saved. The price paid for my sin was the most precious gift that God had and He allowed it to die a painful death and take upon a heavy burden (my sin). It was not through gold, or silver...but the precious blood of His Son.
Father, thank you for your Son and the work that He did on the cross for me. Thank you for the resurrection, without which I would be hopeless. Thank you for your holiness, of which I yearn to imitate. Help me to continue pursuing holiness by the strength of your Spirit. I know I fall far short of this call because of my sin, that is why I need your grace in forgiveness and endurance to finish this race.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Grace in relationships
As the day comes to an end, I again ask myself how I have been seeing God's grace today. One theme stands out for me today...relationships. Today was such a blessing as the Lord allowed me to counsel three people today, all highlighting the fact that God has given us a responsibility to each other. We are a community and a lot of times God deals with us as a community, not just as individuals. Relationships are perhaps one of the most powerful means by which God sanctifies us here on earth. They are messy, yes. But they show us just how sinful we are, they expose our weaknesses, and God uses them to test us in a lot of areas. God did not create each and every one of us with an island of our own, although sometimes we do wish that were the case to escape all these challenges. I think about the psalmist's cry:
"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way" (Psalm 139: 23, 24)
How does God do this? Through relationships? Not to limit it to this because He uses other means as well. I am called to make sure I am at peace with all men, to make sure that broken relationships are restored (especially with my brethren). I am called to look out for the best interest of others, not to defraud others. There are countless verses in Scripture that focus on the importance of this. When I look at my responsibility and call to stewardship in relationships, I am convinced, in fact, I know this is too high a calling and I can not make it...save from the grace of God.
Thank you Lord for the relationships that you have blessed me with. I ask that you use them to search my heart and my thoughts that I may see if there is any hurtful way in me and lead me in the everlasting way. I ask for your grace in this, without which I am helpless.
"Search me, O God, and know my heart;
Try me and know my anxious thoughts;
And see if there be any hurtful way in me,
And lead me in the everlasting way" (Psalm 139: 23, 24)
How does God do this? Through relationships? Not to limit it to this because He uses other means as well. I am called to make sure I am at peace with all men, to make sure that broken relationships are restored (especially with my brethren). I am called to look out for the best interest of others, not to defraud others. There are countless verses in Scripture that focus on the importance of this. When I look at my responsibility and call to stewardship in relationships, I am convinced, in fact, I know this is too high a calling and I can not make it...save from the grace of God.
Thank you Lord for the relationships that you have blessed me with. I ask that you use them to search my heart and my thoughts that I may see if there is any hurtful way in me and lead me in the everlasting way. I ask for your grace in this, without which I am helpless.
Humbling grace
I had a really good talk with a friend of mine about how a lot of times we compete for control with God. This is especially manifested in how we react to the ones we love, or are closest to us, and indeed, all relationships. I think that this is especially a huge challenge if one is in a relationship or pursing one. The Lord has been teaching me to trust Him with people. The reality of it is that God does not need me in taking care of my family or my girlfriend. I am not the dependent means by which these close people in my life will be sanctified. It's a privilege when God gives me a small part to play in it, yes, but it's also a huge blessing when the Lord allows you to realize and practice the essential of trusting Him.
To be honest, I have caught myself sometimes being jealous when the close people in my life have sought advice elsewhere and it has changed their thinking when perhaps I would have had the same talk with them and it wouldn't have made sense to them. This has been very humbling to realise my place within God's work, a servant. A servant does not demand what his selfish desires want. Instead, being a servant also entails realizing that the world does not revolve around you. Being a godly servant to others also entails you denying yourself by even praying that the Lord would use people (other than you) in the lives of those whom we hold dear, in teaching them and growing them. I think of Matthew 9:36-38
"Seeing the people He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd. Then He said to His disciples, 'the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His Harvest.' (italics added)
The reality of it is that people are God's harvest, not ours. People who are close to us, and to whom we minister to are God's harvest. We are commanded in this passage to pray to the Father that He may send more workers for His work. My influence in relationships, and ministry is not a one-man deal, it is not meant to be a selfish thing. Praise the Lord if my words fall on deaf ears to a friend of mine and the Lord uses another person. We tend to care more about our influence than people's hearts. We are prideful, selfish beings. Proverbs 1:5 reads:
'A wise man will hear and increase in learning, And a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel.'
Lord, help me to be humble in realizing my place as your servant, and a servant to others. Help me to see the bigger picture of your name being glorified through what you desire, rather than what I desire. Help me to be slow to speak, quick to hear, slow to anger, and quick to glorify your name. I ask Father that you send people to the lives of those closest to me, and those that I minister to, to be used by you in sanctifying them through your Spirit.
To be honest, I have caught myself sometimes being jealous when the close people in my life have sought advice elsewhere and it has changed their thinking when perhaps I would have had the same talk with them and it wouldn't have made sense to them. This has been very humbling to realise my place within God's work, a servant. A servant does not demand what his selfish desires want. Instead, being a servant also entails realizing that the world does not revolve around you. Being a godly servant to others also entails you denying yourself by even praying that the Lord would use people (other than you) in the lives of those whom we hold dear, in teaching them and growing them. I think of Matthew 9:36-38
"Seeing the people He felt compassion for them, because they were distressed and dispirited like sheep without a shepherd. Then He said to His disciples, 'the harvest is plentiful, but the workers are few. Therefore beseech the Lord of the harvest to send out workers into His Harvest.' (italics added)
The reality of it is that people are God's harvest, not ours. People who are close to us, and to whom we minister to are God's harvest. We are commanded in this passage to pray to the Father that He may send more workers for His work. My influence in relationships, and ministry is not a one-man deal, it is not meant to be a selfish thing. Praise the Lord if my words fall on deaf ears to a friend of mine and the Lord uses another person. We tend to care more about our influence than people's hearts. We are prideful, selfish beings. Proverbs 1:5 reads:
'A wise man will hear and increase in learning, And a man of understanding will acquire wise counsel.'
Lord, help me to be humble in realizing my place as your servant, and a servant to others. Help me to see the bigger picture of your name being glorified through what you desire, rather than what I desire. Help me to be slow to speak, quick to hear, slow to anger, and quick to glorify your name. I ask Father that you send people to the lives of those closest to me, and those that I minister to, to be used by you in sanctifying them through your Spirit.
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Sovereign Grace
I came home really late last night, well, more like 1am after hanging out with my Bible study group. I am really thankful to God for this great group. It is really cool to be in a church, or Bible study group that you can desire to spend six hours with and not think much about it. We did a study on Genesis 39 led by Jim. It's amazing how much more you get out of a passage when you study it as a group and get different perspectives from it. Joseph was taken from being his father's favorite son to being thrown in a pit, to being a slave, to being put in charge of Potiphar's household, to being accused falsely by his master's wife, to being put in prison, to being put in charge of all the prisoners to being second only to Pharaoh. It is interesting to see how he was taken from highs and lows in his life and station, in all this he was still faithful to God, and always aware that God was with him. The phrase 'God was with him' appears several times in this passage which shows that it was not the fact that Joseph was smart, or skilled, or anything, that made him successful or be blessed. It was the fact that God was with him.
It is also interesting to see that as we read about his life, we can kind of track and see where God was leading him and what was going to be the final result. However, this is from our (the reader's) perspective. From Joseph's perspective, he had no idea what God was doing in his life. All he could see was the then, not the far off. I wonder what thoughts he must have had as his life went down and up. But, it is really encouraging to see how he trusted in the Lord one day at a time knowing that God saw the big picture and he just had to be faithful in the small picture. How did he do this? By being conscious of God's presence (knowing that any sin was a sin against God), doing his work diligently, fleeing from sin. I think about this and see just how much Joseph's life shows us how we should trust God in the little things, day by day, knowing that God is with us. We get so consumed a lot of times as to what God's will is for our lives trying to look at the really big picture and forget what God's revealed will is for our lives today. Flee youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace...(2 Timothy 2:22) has been on my mind this past week as a daily calling that represents God's will for my life.
One of the things that was brought up last night was that obedience does not obligate God to bless us, in our human anticipation at least. Yes, Scripture does give precedence that God blesses us when we are obedient. However, we do not, and cannot define what this blessing will be (financial or otherwise). Would I be content if I was Joseph and never got to be second only to Pharaoh, but spent the rest of my life in prison trusting that God was still with me? Am I content with not knowing God's secret will (as Joseph) but show how I am trusting Him by following His revealed will daily?
It is also interesting to see that as we read about his life, we can kind of track and see where God was leading him and what was going to be the final result. However, this is from our (the reader's) perspective. From Joseph's perspective, he had no idea what God was doing in his life. All he could see was the then, not the far off. I wonder what thoughts he must have had as his life went down and up. But, it is really encouraging to see how he trusted in the Lord one day at a time knowing that God saw the big picture and he just had to be faithful in the small picture. How did he do this? By being conscious of God's presence (knowing that any sin was a sin against God), doing his work diligently, fleeing from sin. I think about this and see just how much Joseph's life shows us how we should trust God in the little things, day by day, knowing that God is with us. We get so consumed a lot of times as to what God's will is for our lives trying to look at the really big picture and forget what God's revealed will is for our lives today. Flee youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, peace...(2 Timothy 2:22) has been on my mind this past week as a daily calling that represents God's will for my life.
One of the things that was brought up last night was that obedience does not obligate God to bless us, in our human anticipation at least. Yes, Scripture does give precedence that God blesses us when we are obedient. However, we do not, and cannot define what this blessing will be (financial or otherwise). Would I be content if I was Joseph and never got to be second only to Pharaoh, but spent the rest of my life in prison trusting that God was still with me? Am I content with not knowing God's secret will (as Joseph) but show how I am trusting Him by following His revealed will daily?
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Grace amazing
I have been thinking through what to preach on in a couple of weeks at Live Again. Monday was especially such a huge blessing. I went there with the intention of not saying anything, just listen. I felt I was losing my passion for this ministry and was losing the desire to be there. I needed a powerful reminder of why I was there and God provided that. Listening to these men speak reignited that spark. I am reminded of John 10 which can pretty much be summarized by saying that the good Shepherd knows his sheep. I needed to know my sheep more, being quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, as James puts it. Santos, almost 60 years old sat in the metal chair accounting his life of drugs and crime. He did not care what anyone thought and life revolved around him. He has been married for over thirty years and of those he has only been with his wife a total of fourteen because of being in and out of prison. Another guy, Abraham, now 18, has been addicted to meth since he was 13. One other man, I forgot his name, but he is now 38, was shot eight times in the head by police as he tried to run away. He is married and has two daughters. There is a face behind each name, a life behind each face, a family behind each life. These men have left a trail of destruction in their lives and in the lives of their wives, children, and parents. When one looks at them there thought that they are beyond redemption is not far from thought. But the fact is that they are not. They are no different that Zacharias, or Matthew, or Nicodemus, or Saul, or me. The power of the Gospel is able to change their lives. That is why I go there, because I believe in the work of Christ, because I want to be faithful to proclaim the gospel to them, even if I do not see fruit in this ministry because the reality is that God is at work in ways that I cannot comprehend.
I am really encouraged by the relationships I have built with these men. That I can laugh with them, touch their shoulders, embrace them, is truly a blessing from the Lord. That there is now a trust between us for most of them as they lay out the grossest details of their lives is even more amazing. I am thankful to God for this. That they can listen to a 24 year old who is half the age of most of them shows the power of God to use even the weakest tool, me. I am looking forward to my next sermon more than I have in a while because of that pause on Monday, and hearing them say how much they are understanding more about God although they cannot explain it. My job is just to be faithful, to be obedient, to be salt and light, all the while being loving and humble. May the Lord give me grace in this.
I am really encouraged by the relationships I have built with these men. That I can laugh with them, touch their shoulders, embrace them, is truly a blessing from the Lord. That there is now a trust between us for most of them as they lay out the grossest details of their lives is even more amazing. I am thankful to God for this. That they can listen to a 24 year old who is half the age of most of them shows the power of God to use even the weakest tool, me. I am looking forward to my next sermon more than I have in a while because of that pause on Monday, and hearing them say how much they are understanding more about God although they cannot explain it. My job is just to be faithful, to be obedient, to be salt and light, all the while being loving and humble. May the Lord give me grace in this.
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Grace sufficient
At different points of the day I like to ask myself the question 'how am I seeing God's grace?' I think that a Christian's worldview should be saturated by a constant awareness of how God is working in his or her life. But then there must also be a perspective that cultivates trust and adoration for the Lord Jehovah even when one does not see evidence of God's grace at that moment. This is where the true test lies in believing that God is real, God is good, and God is present. The reality of it is that sometimes we miss the big picture when looking for evidence of how God is working in our lives. There was an event that took place over a thousand years ago. This event had been looked forward to by generations and is looked back to by generations after it. It is an event whose power starts working in one's life after regeneration. This event is the most profound evidence of God's grace that one can ever hold on to at every moment of life. Christ became the God-man, lived an exemplary life to be followed, took upon our sin as He died on the cross, rose again on third day proving He is God and our hope, and sits at the right hand of the Father. He will come again and judge the world. For those who have trusted in Him there is eternal life: a real promise in a real Heaven in the direct presence ofa real God. Praise the Lord!
On Sunday our pastor talked about how a Christian's life is to be a joyful life because of the inheritance we have. The source of our inheritance is God the Father. Our Heavenly Father qualified us for this inheritance through the fact that we He rescued us (liberated, saved, delivered) from the domain of sin, transferred us (removed and reestablished) into light, and redeemed (released by payment of price) us through His Son Jesus Christ. We are indeed rich as Followers of Christ. We now have the right to be called children of God (John 1:11-12) having direct access to Him as our present share in this inheritance, and look forward to the future share of being in Heaven with Him (1 John 3:2). Because of this we can live each life joyful. God's grace is sufficient.
I was looking back the past few days on the time when I was sick last week. I threw up in my car on the freeway and am still trying to get the stench out of my car. The question I have been asking myself is what the Lord taught me and has been teaching me through that experience. I have also been thinking about how we as Christians should respond to sickness and suffering in our lives and in the lives of others. It is very easy for us to pray a prayer of getting better without thinking about what pleases God and what He is accomplishing through that time. I strongly believe that there is something far superior that we should think and pray about than someone feeling better; redemption and sanctification. Whenever one comes out of a season of sickness or suffering, I think it is a fair question to ask 'If I had a choice, am I willing to relive this experience?' I think the answer to this question says a lot about how conscious you have been to God working in your life compared to focusing on just the pain. Could I exchange just feeling better for the invaluable sanctification that came with it?
A lot of things are going on in my life right now, in fact a lot of things were going on during that week that are ministry related. One of the ways sickness and suffering is used by God in our lives as a show of His grace is to keep us away or protect us from sin. The thought has crossed my mind, could it be that God was humbling me and keeping me away from pride, something that should be an ongoing reminder in ministry? I know that time God definitely drove me closer to relying on Him especially the after period as I reflect on it. I have been meditating on one passage in particular and was praying through it when I was unwell. It talks about power being perfected in our weakness. I have been thinking about an analogy of steel. If you have an iron bar and you want to shape it or mold it into something you want to perfectly, you cannot do it when it is hard. You have to put it under fire to a point when it is weak and perhaps almost melting. The shape of its outcome is perfected in its weakness. Perhaps this is what it is like for us. God puts us in state of brokenness, sometimes physically to rouse our ears to His voice. The sad reality is that sometimes we do not take the time to stop and listen. Paul writes:
7Because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me--to keep me from exalting myself!
8Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me.
9And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness " Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
10Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong (2 Corinthians 12)
Lord, teach me to be humble when serving you and not to exalt myself, both when I am physically weak and physically strong. Help me in the times when I implore you, to hear your voice pointing me to your grace. Help me to boast in my weaknesses knowing that your power dwells in me. Teach me to be content with weaknesses, insults, distress, persecutions, difficulties for Christ's sake. Thank you for your grace and how it is sufficient for me.
On Sunday our pastor talked about how a Christian's life is to be a joyful life because of the inheritance we have. The source of our inheritance is God the Father. Our Heavenly Father qualified us for this inheritance through the fact that we He rescued us (liberated, saved, delivered) from the domain of sin, transferred us (removed and reestablished) into light, and redeemed (released by payment of price) us through His Son Jesus Christ. We are indeed rich as Followers of Christ. We now have the right to be called children of God (John 1:11-12) having direct access to Him as our present share in this inheritance, and look forward to the future share of being in Heaven with Him (1 John 3:2). Because of this we can live each life joyful. God's grace is sufficient.
I was looking back the past few days on the time when I was sick last week. I threw up in my car on the freeway and am still trying to get the stench out of my car. The question I have been asking myself is what the Lord taught me and has been teaching me through that experience. I have also been thinking about how we as Christians should respond to sickness and suffering in our lives and in the lives of others. It is very easy for us to pray a prayer of getting better without thinking about what pleases God and what He is accomplishing through that time. I strongly believe that there is something far superior that we should think and pray about than someone feeling better; redemption and sanctification. Whenever one comes out of a season of sickness or suffering, I think it is a fair question to ask 'If I had a choice, am I willing to relive this experience?' I think the answer to this question says a lot about how conscious you have been to God working in your life compared to focusing on just the pain. Could I exchange just feeling better for the invaluable sanctification that came with it?
A lot of things are going on in my life right now, in fact a lot of things were going on during that week that are ministry related. One of the ways sickness and suffering is used by God in our lives as a show of His grace is to keep us away or protect us from sin. The thought has crossed my mind, could it be that God was humbling me and keeping me away from pride, something that should be an ongoing reminder in ministry? I know that time God definitely drove me closer to relying on Him especially the after period as I reflect on it. I have been meditating on one passage in particular and was praying through it when I was unwell. It talks about power being perfected in our weakness. I have been thinking about an analogy of steel. If you have an iron bar and you want to shape it or mold it into something you want to perfectly, you cannot do it when it is hard. You have to put it under fire to a point when it is weak and perhaps almost melting. The shape of its outcome is perfected in its weakness. Perhaps this is what it is like for us. God puts us in state of brokenness, sometimes physically to rouse our ears to His voice. The sad reality is that sometimes we do not take the time to stop and listen. Paul writes:
7Because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me--to keep me from exalting myself!
8Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me.
9And He has said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness " Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.
10Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong (2 Corinthians 12)
Lord, teach me to be humble when serving you and not to exalt myself, both when I am physically weak and physically strong. Help me in the times when I implore you, to hear your voice pointing me to your grace. Help me to boast in my weaknesses knowing that your power dwells in me. Teach me to be content with weaknesses, insults, distress, persecutions, difficulties for Christ's sake. Thank you for your grace and how it is sufficient for me.
Saturday, October 6, 2007
Grace in weakness
Today was yet another day at outreach week serving my church, Church of the Canyons. As I go to bed, I cannot help but be thankful to God for blessing me with such a great church. It has indeed become a second family to me. It is really neat to see a picture of a church that strives to be with the same mind, united in spirit, and intent on one purpose as Paul writes in Philippians 2:2. We had the church workday and quite a number of people showed up. It was neat to see some of the older people in the church joking around with us younger ones. I was using the leaf blower as most of the guys weeded, cut trees and hedges, and some were in the church cleaning the light bulbs and so forth. I blew leaves on Karen, one of the older women at my church and she jokingly hit me with her rake on my head and said it was also by mistake. That was really funny.
I saw pastor Bob again today and he surprised me by saying how much he enjoyed our talk two days ago. it really meant a lot to hear that because he is taking where I'm at in my life seriously and also looks forward to the church coming alongside me as i seek to realize where God will have me be in the next few years as my desire for missions keeps growing. There were quite a few guys from Streamline too: Daren, Brian, Michelle, Patty. I would have loved to be at the Bible study tonight but I had to work from 2pm till 9pm. We still have odd hours since it's still outreach week. For the most part I think I managed to be faithful at work and got a lot accomplished. It was really hard though to keep a mindset of why I was pushing to get a lot done, which was for God's glory. I caught myself several times having the mindset of personal achievement at work which was really prideful and selfish.
'whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men' (Col 3.23).
I forgot to pay my credit card bill again today. I was really disappointed with myself and was discouraged for a while. I seem to be falling repeatedly into this temptation of not being on top of things in my finances which is not glorifying to God in being a good steward of my money. I am going to get charged a late fee. I was thinking today as I was praying that if I were not me, I would have given up on myself a long time ago. I am thankful that God does not give up on me and is faithful to complete the work that He began in me. In my discouragement, I ended up being encouraged by such a great God that I serve.
I thank you Lord for your faithfulness to yourself and to me which is so in contrast to my disloyalty to you. Thank you for showing me my sin today. I know I get discouraged Lord when I do not do good. I am thankful Lord that within that you do remind me that I am not perfect, but a work in progress. Help me to grow in the areas that I need growth in, relying on your Spirit, and ever ready to give you the glory for it.
I saw pastor Bob again today and he surprised me by saying how much he enjoyed our talk two days ago. it really meant a lot to hear that because he is taking where I'm at in my life seriously and also looks forward to the church coming alongside me as i seek to realize where God will have me be in the next few years as my desire for missions keeps growing. There were quite a few guys from Streamline too: Daren, Brian, Michelle, Patty. I would have loved to be at the Bible study tonight but I had to work from 2pm till 9pm. We still have odd hours since it's still outreach week. For the most part I think I managed to be faithful at work and got a lot accomplished. It was really hard though to keep a mindset of why I was pushing to get a lot done, which was for God's glory. I caught myself several times having the mindset of personal achievement at work which was really prideful and selfish.
'whatever you do, do your work heartily, as for the Lord rather than for men' (Col 3.23).
I forgot to pay my credit card bill again today. I was really disappointed with myself and was discouraged for a while. I seem to be falling repeatedly into this temptation of not being on top of things in my finances which is not glorifying to God in being a good steward of my money. I am going to get charged a late fee. I was thinking today as I was praying that if I were not me, I would have given up on myself a long time ago. I am thankful that God does not give up on me and is faithful to complete the work that He began in me. In my discouragement, I ended up being encouraged by such a great God that I serve.
I thank you Lord for your faithfulness to yourself and to me which is so in contrast to my disloyalty to you. Thank you for showing me my sin today. I know I get discouraged Lord when I do not do good. I am thankful Lord that within that you do remind me that I am not perfect, but a work in progress. Help me to grow in the areas that I need growth in, relying on your Spirit, and ever ready to give you the glory for it.
Friday, October 5, 2007
Grace in sin
A greater part of my life was spent with a warped view of who I am. I was a good person. Within my anger and emptiness of heart, I was still a good person because there was reason behind my madness. The world centered around me. I was saved around the age of 17 and have been a follower of Christ for 7 years now. As I grow more in the Lord I am still confronted by this one question: what is the essence of my nature?
'The more the Holy Spirit puts his finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand the wells to my nature' (Francis Schaeffer: True Spirituality)
I think what Schaffer was saying in this is that we often fool ourselves deep inside our hearts of the degree to which we are now sinning less, create an illusion of how we are on the fast track to holiness in our lives. He writes later that as the Holy Spirit has wrestled with him over the years, he is more aware of the depths of his own nature. I think I relate to what he is saying in that I can honestly say that I have never seen myself as being more selfish in my life than I do now. There always seems to be something for me in 'the good that I do' and I hate how that looks from where I stand. So am I totally depraved?...yes. When I look at that and begin to understand that more, I am at awe and humbled at the thought that God still uses me in ministry when my selfishness and sin taints it. What s it about Him? I have been struck by the thought of how God is so patient with me when I do not deserve any of His grace. I am thankful for His grace and His Holy Spirit.
'The more the Holy Spirit puts His finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand that there are deep wells to my nature.'
'The more the Holy Spirit puts his finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand the wells to my nature' (Francis Schaeffer: True Spirituality)
I think what Schaffer was saying in this is that we often fool ourselves deep inside our hearts of the degree to which we are now sinning less, create an illusion of how we are on the fast track to holiness in our lives. He writes later that as the Holy Spirit has wrestled with him over the years, he is more aware of the depths of his own nature. I think I relate to what he is saying in that I can honestly say that I have never seen myself as being more selfish in my life than I do now. There always seems to be something for me in 'the good that I do' and I hate how that looks from where I stand. So am I totally depraved?...yes. When I look at that and begin to understand that more, I am at awe and humbled at the thought that God still uses me in ministry when my selfishness and sin taints it. What s it about Him? I have been struck by the thought of how God is so patient with me when I do not deserve any of His grace. I am thankful for His grace and His Holy Spirit.
'The more the Holy Spirit puts His finger on my life and goes down deep into my life, the more I understand that there are deep wells to my nature.'
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